The Games People Play

Okay, this is my confessional. It's taken me a long time to realize it, but here goes:

My name is Brandi, and I am Horrible at Games.

Do you remember being a kid, and that first time your mother warned you, "No one likes a sore loser?" Well, I am a sore loser, a gloating winner, and everything in between.

Oh, yes, friends. I have been known to throw dice a little too violently, pout when someone one-ups me, and literally bounce in my seat in delight when I am winning. It has been known that towards the end of the game, my voice gets a little shriller and louder. Friends have been known to roll their eyes and silently mouth, "NEVER!" to each other behind my back when I suggest a round of poker. Some may protest that they have played games with me and never seen this side of me. Rest assured, if I'm in a setting where I need to be polite I can, but I will be going insane inside and will recap the entire game to someone else in excruciating detail later.

And like most things in my life, for this, I blame my mother.

(I do that a lot on here, don't I? I think part of it is because I think she's the only one who really reads this, and she knows it's because I love her.)

If I ran in the house, making the original Nintendo Entertainment System mess up and restart Super Mario Bros 3 just as she was about to reach world 7, I was sure to receive a pop on the bottom. Any attempts at cheating or treating a game of Rummy with anything less than the utmost seriousness would cause my mother to fold her cards, proclaim that I "wasn't playing right" and refuse any games for weeks. And when I tried to talk her into buying me games like Monopoly Jr, she would roll her eyes. "Why? You've been playing real Monopoly since you were five!" She didn't understand that all of my friends' parents would only let them play the junior version, allowing me to feel awkward when finding things to do at sleepovers.

But I digress.

A particular friend of mine, who shall remain nameless, has a penchant for cheating at board games, much to my shock. If it's flipping the mini hourglass in Pictionary, mouthing words to me from across the room during Cranium, or winking at me in Clue, I always reprimand him heavily when we are away from others.

"IT'S NOT RIGHT! I want to win because I'm the best, not because I'm on a team with a cheater!"

"It's just a game, Brandi."

A couple of months ago, I was playing Apples to Apples with a few friends. As it was John's turn to choose a card, he stalled, reading every card carefully and weighing his options thoughtfully.

"Pick a card, already! Jeeze, it's not rocket science!" I growled.

Wide eyed, another friend looked at me.

"Brandi, calm down, it's just a game."

Apparently no one else is as concerned with winners and losers as I am.

Which is fine with me. Maybe I should learn something from this and be a little kinder during these bonding activities.

As long as I'm winning.

'Cause who wants to be kind while they are losing?